“How Do You Balance it All?”
On view at the Sears Art Museum Gallery
June 11 - September 17, 2021
155 N University Ave, St. George, UT 84770
Open Monday - Friday 9:00 am - 5:00 pm
Closed weekends and school holidays
“How Do You Balance it All?”
I loathe this question. Here’s a secret: I don’t. I’d argue that no one does. I simply am making time where it is needed most that day, that hour, that minute. And pruning out the rest.
As I was growing up, I was fortunate to have parents that taught me I could learn anything. I chopped wood and brushed my hair. Put on makeup and cleared forest trails. Studied STEM and sewing. I learned to respect, shoot and clean a rifle at 10. Plant a garden and prune back the orchard. There wasn’t much separation of roles for me. Everything felt like fluid teamwork in our family. When my dad decided to become a private pilot, my mom did as well.
It wasn’t until I was in college that I realized that (despite my parent’s diligent efforts show me many options) I felt that women belonged at home. I felt women weren’t as capable, and were studying “just in case” their spouses weren’t able to provide. In my mind, they all had the goal to get married and lay aside their careers for their kids. They were all going to have kids and quit working for a time (maybe forever) and never achieve the level of success as their male counterparts.
Years later, I’m still fighting that paralyzing script. As I learn and heal and grow, I am picking up on ways I’m treated differently from my spouse. Most prominently, are these common lines:
”How do you balance it all?”
”Have you tried Keto?” (Or literally any other diet advice, unless I directly ask, JUST STOP IT)
”Are you done having kids?” or “Why THE HELL do you have THREE children?!?”
”When your husband comes in, tell him to….” (every other time I go to Home Depot, or call a repairman)
My deepest passion is artwork that allows viewers to become part of the art itself. This retired airplane is retrofitted to act as the inside of the mind of a woman healing just like me. Interior gauges have been re-decorated. These “monitor” food intake, tasks completed per day, number of children, etc. Things commonly critiqued in my life and the life of my peers, living in a conservative state that values domestic accomplishment and external looks - often at the exclusion of other worthy endeavors.
As a pilot, I trained in an airplane of the same make and model, and therefore each gauge has special significance to me - I put faith in these gauges every time I fly. As I created this piece, I pondered what they parallel in my life.
Like car license plates, airplanes have tail numbers, or “N numbers”. This airplane started with “N1CANT” (lettering by Markus Long), and in a personal act of rebellion, was changed to “N1CAN2”. The body of the airplane was riddled with bullet holes - a reminder that opposition is to be expected, and can be overcome, though it might still leave a mark. “I can’t” is an expression I hear frequently from women - and rarely from men. I’m excited to see the world change as we give ourselves power to shift this thinking, and take control of our lives, even when circumstances are less than ideal.
Exhibit attendees are invited to climb into the airplane, manipulate the controls, and reflect on the complicated and often conflicting expectations we put on women, here in Utah and around the world. I hope to promote a shift in thinking both for those who receive such commentary, and those who give it, allowing for more flexibility and freedom for individuals and families impacted.
Aerial footage by Tylan Draper
Still photography by Kelsey Atherton
